The Cleveland Show Season 1 Episode 10 - Fields Of Streams

* my name is cleveland brown *
* and I am proud to be *
* right back in my hometown *
* with my new family *
* there's old friends
and new friends *
* and even a bear *
* through good times
and bad times *
* it's true love we share *
* and so I found a place *
* where everyone will know *
* my happy mustached face *
* this is the cleveland show. *
(chuckles)

Bitchin' bods! Totally awesome!
I ain't afraid of no ghost!
You ladies want a ride in my bran
d-new '84 Trans Am?
Forget about those sophomore chicks, Terry.
We're graduating this year.
Class of '84.
Man, I can't wait for the
1984 Olympics this year!
(rock music plays)
CLEVELAND: It was 1984.
All right, you animals, listen up, now.
Our man Cleveland Brown
is officially a legend.
Not only did he win last night's game
with a home run in the bottom of the ninth,
but Coach McFall said they're
gonna retire his number
after the season.
To Hot Brown Number Nine!
(whooping)
Yeah! Yeah!
How shot J.R.?
Are y'all drinking beer?!
Hey. Wally Farker, right?
You want in?
It's Farquhar.
And no, I don't want in.
But in is what I'm gonna turn you —
in to the principal.
Oh, come on, all we're doing
is letting off a little steam.
Don't touch me!
That's how you get AIDS.
Ha! What Wally doesn't know
is that I'm wearing a
condom right now.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm off to report you to the principal.
Uh-uh!
What you talkin' about, Wallace?
Hold this.
(whimpering)
(yells)
Uh, ew...
(laughing)
Hey, guys, look!
He's peeing himself!
(laughter)
(sobbing): Oh... no...
It's all over my thigh and pocket contents.
(laughter)
WALLY: No!
* *
(laughter)
He peed on his thigh and pocket contents!
Hey, you want a cold one?
Does Amy Winehouse pick at her skin a lot?
Man, all this talk about
the old baseball field.
Know what I say we do?
Start a fight with those old ladies
in red hats and purple dresses at the mall?
No. (laughs)
Come on, get serious.
No, I was gonna... (laughs)
Okay, seriously,
I was gonna say... Aw!
(tires screeching) CLEVELAND: Yee-haw!
(blows landing, martial arts grunts)
Ow!
Yaah! (bone breaks)
(laughter)
Did you see me?
I was all, "Yaah!" (laughs)
Now, if I may finish the
point I was making earlier,
we should stop by the old ball field.
Oh, cool! Maybe after that,
we can drive over and visit my daughter.
I haven't seen her for a year and a half.
We'll see how we're doing on time.
Look at this place!
The bleachers are covered with racist,
occasionally hilarious graffiti.
I'm surprised the team can
even play on this mess.
Oh, no, there is no team.
When Wally became principal,
he disbanded the baseball program.
Disbanded the team?!
But baseball's our slowly
dying national pastime.
Oh, this is a worse travesty than
that remake of Chinatown
with Miley Cyrus.
She's my sister!
(loud slap) She's my daughter!
(slap) She's my sister
and my daughter!
Is that wacky tabacky?
Uh... no.
Oh, thank goodness.
You're good kids.
(laughs)
But watch the height of that five.
All fives must be shoulder-height or below.
Mm. Smells like a relaxing
afternoon around here.
Hey, Wally, this school
needs a baseball team.
Can't afford it — not with the
popularity of the Math Club
and the Fluffers,
my a cappella singing group.
What if I could raise the money
before the season starts?
Why not? I'd love to see you
raise five grand in a week.
Thank you.