Robot Chicken - Season 1 Episode 14

It's alive!
Oh, sweet [Bleep]
in a birch bark canoe!
You, all right?
I learned it from watching you!
Whew, man.
It's... not easy
being William Shatner.
Actor, singer... rancher...
all-around... macho hombre.
Oh, yeah.
Time to... beam me down
a good night's sleep.
You're needed.
Huh. So, you have come back,
mi amor.
Oh, s'il vous plaоt.
I know I do not
deserve forgiveness...
but give me one last chance, no?
What you're here for,
it is not important.
All that matters is our love.
Oh, run away with me.
I curse you.
Here. You'll find them
at this address.
Finally, the secret is ours.
They will have to accept
our demands now.
Ohh! You!
Ohh! You!
You shot me!
The world is safe again
thanks to you.
Yawn.
Where do these things...
keep... coming from?
Shazam!
I did it. I reunited
that boy with his puppy.
What the...
Come here, baby.
What's taking so long?
Oh, boy.
There's no such thing
as stupid questions...
except for Billy's questions.
You're not really an atheist,
are you, Todd?
Look, I just don't believe
in the whole heaven-hell thing.
Wow, what an unfortunate, uh...
- Plot device?
- Yeah. Plot device.
Holy [Bleep].
Heaven does exist.
Holy [Bleep]. It's beautiful.
What... what's going on?
Down! Down!
Damn you, F.A. A!
Todd.
Holy [Bleep]. Grandma!
It's so good to see you.
And... Uncle Steve.
Holy [Bleep].
They let you in here?
Yeah. Turns out
we were doing stuff...
the priests
were into themselves.
Lucky me.
I was a serial killer...
but repented in prison
and went to heaven.
I killed hundreds
in the name of our Lord.
Well, I'm just as surprised
as you are.
Uh, hey. You work here.
Since day one.
What can I do for you?
What's with the hypocrisy
around here?
Why is Uncle Steve here?
And the serial killer gets in
because he repents?
Well, if you're
gonna bitch so much...
I can return you to earth
at any time.
- Really?
- Sure.
Just look over there.
Ohh, douchebag.
So there was this truck,
and it came out of nowhere...
you see, and it hit our friend.
Holy [Bleep].
It's a miracle.
Hey, guys, I'm back!
And I have so much to...
Wow. That's, uh...
that's so, um...
- Ironic?
- Yeah, yeah. Ironic.
Sam, Ziggy says
in order to leap out...
you got to work the shaft.
Work the shaft, Sam.
There you go.
China is in here, Mr. Burton.
Wow! I can record
my favorite shows...
and teach it to record
other shows that I like!
This is great! What did I do
without this thing?
- Hello?
- Hey, buddy.
We're heading out to the bar.
You want to come?
Why don't you take your bar
and shove it up your ass?
I'm watching TiVo!
But, but...
- Hello?
- This is your boss.
You're very late.
Are you even coming in today?
No. Uh, TiVo.
You're fired!
Oh, my God. My poor baby.
You just get off the couch...
and come with me.
Mom is here to help.
We got to go, baby. We got to go
and get some help. Come on.
We'll get through this together.
You just get off that couch
and get up.
Love... you... TiVo.
TiVo. It'll change your life.
No, it's not a tumor.
It's not a tumor at all.
The amazing true story that touched
the hearts of generations...
is now a motion picture
you'll never forget.
"Dear diary,
this is my chronicle...
"Of a most unfortunate time.
"My name is Anne. Anne Frank."
Awesome.
"Luckily, everything I want
is right here."
My bread is so unleavened