My Name Is Earl Season 1 Episode 6 - Broke Joy's Fancy Figurine

You know the kind of guy
who does nothing but bad things...
and then wonders why
his life sucks?
Well, that was me. Every time
somethin'good happened to me...
somethin'bad was always waitin'
around the corner.
Karma.
That's when I realized
I had to change.
So I made a list
of everything bad I've ever done...
and, one by one,
I'm gonna make up for all my mistakes.
I'm just tryin'to be
a better person.
My name is Earl.
[ Earl Narrating ]
Winning $ 1 00,000 in the lottery...
has opened the door
to the finer things in life.
- Where have you been?
- Food shoppin'.
- You got real Frosted Flakes.
- No more generic Sweetie Bits for you, brother.
You're ridin' the karma train now.
Choo, choo.
[ Earl Narrating ] I like being able
to afford nice things for my brother.
But having money
can create problems too.
That's my ex-wifeJoy.
What do you think you're doing?
- Hi, Carolina.
- Catalina.
Mmm, potato, tomato. So where
does Earl keep his money?
Earl is my friend. I'm not gonna
help you steal his money.
Oh, well, that's unfortunate for you...
because you are not the one standing
with the freshly broken bottle, now, are you?
Well, this'll still hurt
if I hit you with it.
Joy, I've told you a million times...
the money isn't in the room.
- Stop breaking in here and messing the place up.
- Fine.
But if you get to eat fancy cereal,
your kids should too.
They're not my kids,Joy.
That must have been
very scary for you.
I can't live like this,Joy.
What do I need to do to get you
to stop trying to steal my money?
Buy me a hot tub.
I'm not gonna buy you a hot tub.
I need my money to help me
cross the things off my list.
Hey, Earl, thanks for the flakes.
No problem, Crab Man.
You and that stupid list of things
you done bad to people-
- I better be on there somewhere.
- You are.
- There was a lot of things on here I did to you.
- Like what?
- You want me to do one?
- Well, what's on there?
- If I do one, will you leave me alone for a while?
- Yeah, fine. What's on there?
All right, here's a good one.
Number 1 53- brokeJoy's fancy figurine.
I found something.
[ Giggling ]
Beer bottle. I'll get a beer bottle.
- You're the one that broke my figurine?
- I'm gonna make it up to you.
Are you now?
Let me ask you a question.
What happens when you can't fix
the bad thing you done to somebody?
- What do you do then?
- I guess I figure out another
way to make it up to them.
- Like maybe buying them a hot tub?
- I'm not buying you a hot tub.
I don't think you have a choice,
'cause that figurine was irreplaceable.
It was a weird little princess
riding a lawn mower.
Just tell me where you got it
and I can buy you a new one.
Hey, Earl-Temporary tattoos.
You want 'em?
No, thanks, Crab Man. Make me itch.
I'll be back with your figurine.
Yeah, and I'll be buck naked behind
the trailer, waitin' for my hot tub.
Come on, boys. Get up here
and eat your spaghetti.
[ Earl Narrating ]
Once I start doing something on my list...
I become obsessed with it
until I cross it off.
I was even dreaming
about that stupid figurine.
"Balboa & Sons Lawn Mowers.''
They're always jabbin' me, and it's
easier to do this while you're sleepin'.
Thank God. I was startin'
to worry they weren't growin'.
Ma'am?
I'm looking to get
some information...
on a figurine with a princess
riding a lawn mower...
that had your company's name on it.
Oh. You'll need to speak