M*A*S*H. (MASH) S1 E2 'To Market, To Market'

0:00:51:##[ Hawkeye Humming ]
0:01:02:##[ Humming Continues ]
0:01:14:You know, we got a big man here. This guy's a two-star general.
0:01:17:Yeah. Take away their skivvies, and they all look like P.F.C.s.
0:01:20:-Phew! -I knew a brigadier once had a star tattooed on his chest...
0:01:25:in case he bumped into anybody in the shower.
0:01:27:Tell me, Doctor. What was the general doing on the front lines, anyway?
0:01:30:This one, he's a fighting general. You know — [ Whistles ]
0:01:34:- In that case, the least we can do is save him. - Mm. If you insist.
0:01:39:- Hey. - What? Okay.
0:01:46:Oh, boy, very shocky. Push the plasma.
0:01:50:Give me 1 00 milligrams of hydrocortisone to give I.V.
0:01:57:- It's empty, Doctor. - Empty? Get another one. - It's the last one.
0:02:01:What are you talkin' about?
0:02:05:All right. Keep pushing the plasma. Get me some O-negative blood on the double.
0:02:08:Hurry up.
0:02:20:All right. Okay. He's out of danger for the time being. Get Spearchucker to finish him.
0:02:23:But don't tell him a mere captain saved his life. He might not pay his bill.
0:02:27:- Come on. - Yeah. Whoever screwed up on those orders — somebody's gonna get it.
0:02:30:- Yeah. You wanna know where? - [ Trapper ] He should be hung up by his thumbs.
0:02:34:I'm old-fashioned. I'm for slipping him a pint of castor oil and locking him in a closet.
0:02:39:- Who are you talking about? - Whoever it is that ordered supplies last month.
0:02:43:It just so happens I signed that requisition, McIntyre.
0:02:47:Well, you almost lost us a man, 'cause this was empty.
0:02:50:Well, well, that's not my fault.
0:02:53:You can't blame me. I certainly had hydrocortisone on my list somewhere.
0:02:56:- Here-Here-Here it is. - I heard that.
0:03:01:You have no right to blame Major Houlihan.
0:03:05:That hydrocortisone and half our other supplies were hijacked before they ever left Seoul.
0:03:08:- It's those vicious black marketeers. - So where are the M.P.s?
0:03:12:Yeah. They're supposed to do something besides direct traffic and rinse their gloves at night.
0:03:16:The army is well aware of its responsibilities. It so happens a truck...
0:03:20:just pulled up outside with our replacement supplies.
0:03:23:Why didn't you say so? Frank's gotta stop every five minutes...
0:03:26:and do a commercial for your friendly American war.
0:03:29:They're insufferable.
0:03:33:Last night I had a dream.
0:03:36:They both broke their jaws and had to have their mouths wired shut.
0:03:41:Sorry I'm late, but I got stopped by an M.P. roadblock. They're checkin' everybody.
0:03:46:The area's crawling with hijackers. Whoops.
0:03:50:- I'll bet you don't know what kind of wood this is. - It's oak.
0:03:54:Nope. It's oak. Just look at it.
0:03:59:It's a hundred years old if it's a day.
0:04:02:Well, this is what a man needs, far from the security of home.
0:04:07:Roots. Solidity.
0:04:11:Strength.
0:04:14:- Henry. Henry, we're in big trouble. - Don't do that.
0:04:18:I'm sorry about that. Hey, how do you like my new desk?
0:04:22:Your new desk? We just lost 200 vials of hydrocortisone.
0:04:26:- What do you want from me? - We want you to call General Hammond...
0:04:30:down in Seoul right away, demand some action.
0:04:33:I couldn't do that.
0:04:36:[ Trapper ] Henry, we have got to have that stuff.
0:04:39:Get me the Fourth Convalescent in Seoul. I want to talk to General Hammond.