30 Rock Season 2 Episode 1 "SeinfeldVision"

Hey.
How was your summer?

Hey, Gary.
How was your summer?

Hey.
How was your summer?

Hey, Jack!
There's my buddy.

Walk with me, Lemon.

You look great.

I can't believe
I haven't spoken to you

since your
heart attack.

That's what I wanted
to talk to you about.

Nobody from corporate
knows about my cardiac event,

and I want to leave it
that way.

I'm back, Lemon.

I've had the most productive
summer of my life.
Me too.

All of my summer
replacement shows were big hits.

"America's Next Top Pirate."
"Are You Stronger Than a Dog?"

"MILF Island."
"MILF Island"?

"25 superhot moms.
50 eighth-grade boys.

No rules."

Oh, yeah,
didn't one of those women

turn out
to be a prostitute?

That doesn't mean she's not
a wonderful, caring MILF.

Well, I had a great summer, too.
And, um...

Did you redecorate, or...

Sir, I have all the latest
"Seinfeld-Vision" promos.

Oh, wonderful.

What's "Seinfeld-Vision"?

Well,
I realized that NBC owns

hundreds of hours
of footage of Seinfeld

from his massively successful
television series, "Seinfeld."

So my old tech guys were able
to digitally capture Seinfeld,

and now we can basically make
him do or say whatever we want.

So for the month
of October,

all of our prime-time shows
will feature

a computerized guest appearance
from Mr. Jerry...

Seinfeld.

If you didn't kill her,
why didn't you stay?

Quit grilling me!

"Seinfeld-Vision"?

Save the cheerleader,
save the world.

Yeah!
That's what I said!

"Seinfeld-Vision"?

Deal or no deal?

I'll take that deal!

Does Jerry Seinfeld know
you're doing this?

Jerry's in Europe
with his family right now.

But by the time
he gets back,

"Seinfeld-Vision" will be
a monster hit.

His kids will go to school,
and their friends will say,

"I really loved your dad on that
episode of 'Medium' last night."

And he's...
he's gonna love it.

Uh-huh.

Well, I had
a great summer, too.

I started a quilt.
I did yoga twice a week.

I wore flip-flops
in public.

I really feel like
this is gonna be my year.

"Biggest Loser."
So, uh, what's up with Floyd?

Uh, we broke up.

We agreed that it was crazy
to try it long-distance.

And I feel great
about it.

Oh, come on.

Lemon, if there's two things
I'm certain of,

one is you will never finish
that quilt...
I know.

...and you are not
over Floyd.

No, I really am, Jack.

I'm telling you,
this is my year.

I feel like
the show's gonna be great.

And I'm very positive that
I'm gonna meet someone else.

Lemon, women your age

are more likely to be mauled
at the zoo than get married.

Good to see you.
Bye.

Glad we're both doing
so great.

Put Floyd's name
on that quilt.

Yo, Ken, I'm gonna use

this whole kitchen area
as my bathroom.

Spread the word.

What is this?

Mr. Jordan's wife
kicked him out.

She froze my credit cards,
Liz Lemon.

And she got custody
of Grizz.

Can I keep my cockatiel
in your office?

No. Go home and apologize
to your wife.

What?
I'm not apologizing.

'Cause for once in my life,
I haven't done anything wrong.

How many years
have you known me, Liz Lemon?

One.

So you know I like to minister
to transvestite prostitutes.

I don't think
I did know that, no.

It's true.
He doesn't mess with them.